Echoes
by ateventide
Summary: One shots, Drabbles, Unfinished Works. Mostly Relena centric
1. Fade into You

One Shot!

GW was the first franchise that made me want to write any ff on. And ofc angst all the WAY!

No specific pairing but some 1xRishness.

* * *

Heero fought the urge to suppress a sigh as the cool liquid burned down this throat. He could almost feel the disapproval radiating from her as he closed his eyes in appreciation. It didn't really matter though. It wouldn't stop him. It hadn't stopped the several drinks before this one and not the one that would probably follow. In fact, it wouldn't even give him pause. At least not anymore.

She was at the window. He knew. He didn't even need to open his eyes to knew where she was. Wasn't that a dynamic of their unorthodox relationship? He always knew. He simply preferred to know where she was. What she was doing and if she was safe. For the world, of course. At least that's what he told himself.

Some days he even _believed_ it.

It was strange he supposed.

An unfamiliar feeling. One that he didn't immediately recognize. With a touch of amusement he thought ironically that covered a good amount of range of emotions. And if he believed in things like fate or destiny, he might even believe that it was truly laughing at him. Mocking him.

So yes, he knew she was at the window. Staring out into the distance. Looking at something or someone. With a smile on her lips that implied she knew something just beyond his understanding. They both knew it was pointless for her to explain it to him. In the end she would just smile at him and let it pass. She always did.

Heero already knew the headache that was forming was going to last the night. And it would keep him up all night which in turn would result in another sleepless night. So thus he was drinking. Drinking was just the latest vice he was trying unsuccessfully to dull the ache that he knew was going to come.

But she didn't say a word.

He could just feel her and it was infuriating. Grating on his already frayed nerves. He should just dig his heels in and ignore her. Ignore everything. Just lose himself in a haze of alcohol and whatever he could get his hands on. Except he could feel her there at the window.

" You didn't love me!" He finally yelled in frustration, opening his eyes. Exasperated he threw his empty glass at the window towards her.

Except she wasn't there.

Frantically his eyes swung around the room searching for her. He blinked and then his vision was filled with her cool blue eyes. Relena continued to smile serenely at him and hesitantly raised a pale delicate hand through his unruly hair. Her blue eyes filled with kindness and warmth. Heero hesitantly closed his eyes and just breathed.

Warm. He'd never admit but it was one of the reasons why he was drawn to her.

The kind of warmth that made him question everything.

The kind of warmth that made him feel.

To want to live and be human.

It was that same feeling that made it hard to breathe. That everyday was just a reminder of just how empty it was now. How very hollow he was.

She had the kind of warmth that inspired peace and literal goodness that transcended across the stars. A living embodiment of a hope that made you believe. That the world she spoke of wasn't just a dream. Everlasting peace was possible. When she spoke you couldn't help but believe. Perhaps that was where he went wrong.

He had **believed**.

And then…

.. she was gone.

From his life. From the world. No one blamed him. Well no one but himself. He knew better. At least more than most of the evils of the world. There was always some group, some radical, just someone who always thought that she didn't deserve to live. Just her breathing was enough for someone to want to kill her. That the world she wanted couldn't be better than this.

He should have known better. Maybe that was what hurt the most. That she had been safe. That she thought she had been. That he actually thought she had been. He had failed.

And she was just _gone_.

Then.

Then nothing made sense.

So he knew. Heero knew that everyday when he woke up looking into those blue eyes that this was a lie. A trick of his mind. They never shared this moment. She never spoke these words. They never crossed that blurred line. She wasn't here. He knew that. He had stood a far watching them lower her body into the ground.

_He knew better._

But..

When she spoke. When she smiled. When she laughed. It was like she was real. He could swear she was. He should have told someone. Anyone. He knew what this was. What she was. Just a manifestation of his subconscious. Of guilt, anger, frustration and of so many things he would never say. Never had a chance to. Never would.

He wondered if it'd be worse. When he let her go. Which he knew would have to. He couldn't live like this. She was gone and nothing was going to bring her back. She was dead and he was alive.

One day he would need to let her go.

….But for today. Just for today. He looked into those blue eyes and drowned as her voice danced across his skin.

"..I guess we'll never know."

* * *

It too hot in NY.


	2. Glow

Duo this time.

* * *

If you asked anyone what Duo Maxwell and Relena Darlian Peacecraft had in common they would probably come up with very little. After all she was princess turned diplomat from Earth and he was an orphan turned Gundam Pilot from the colonies. If you asked either of them, they would also probably agree; not much at all. But if you pushed just a little more, you would see just a little glimmer in each of their eyes. An understanding.

It started out simple enough.

An unspoken rule but something that you quickly realized once you spent time on Relena's security detail. One, there was a lot of people who continuously wanted to kill her. Honestly, it surprised even Duo how much of a _job_ it really was. To the point that Duo marveled how Relena even had the conviction to even get up in the morning. Preaching peace to so many who would gladly snuff out her life in a heartbeat. And two when she was stressed, really stressed she had insomnia. She would often work through the night and then just hunker down in front of one her many fireplaces and just stare.

In the dark hours, when he passed by it didn't seem right to disturb her. After all, everyone had their demons. Even Relena. So, he tried not to bother her. She always seemed to get over it quick enough. If anything, Relena was resilient. Duo supposed she had to be.

One particular bad stretch of stress was going on a week. Sure, she had power naps here and there but Relena wasn't sleeping. She refused to take medication to help saying it made it hard to concentrate. She just flashed that million dollar smile and she made you think everything was going to work out. Duo was good, better than good but he wasn't omnipresent. Hell, the whole month was fraying on his nerves. They had too many close calls lately he grimaced to himself. Too many trips to the hospital luckily for minor injuries. Enough to make his think he wasn't going to be enough anymore. Sighing, Duo made his rounds though her house for the 3rd time. If she didn't sleep, how could he?

Poking his head into her study to check on her, he almost stumbled over his feet at the sight. She was in pajamas with a large bottle of tequila in front of the fireplace. Just staring into fire. The only sounds were the fire crackling and gulps of liquor. She didn't even acknowledge his approach as she took another swig. It was then he noticed her eyes were glazed over as if she was a million miles away.

Hesitantly, Duo wondered if what he was doing was the right thing. They weren't exactly close but they certainly weren't strangers. So, Duo flopped loudly down next to her. He gently took the bottle and taking a large gulp before handing it back into her pale hands. For a while they just sat watching the fire. Relena didn't say anything or even look at him. Just kept drinking. It went on so long that Duo actually felt himself nodding off when she spoke that he almost missed it.

" ...my earliest memory...was of fire" her voice was softer than he had ever heard. Duo didn't dare move and waited for her to continue "..it burned. So hot and bright ...everything to the ground.."

Turning her head she focused her large blue eyes on him. "..sometimes I wonder..after all these years and all these attempts...maybe I should have died that day.."

Duo kept his face perfectly neutral as he looked at her. Firelight reflected off her wide blue eyes and hair making her seem just a touch ethereal. Relena never talked like this. Maybe with Heero he thought idly. Relena was upbeat and happy. She was a light in the dark for everyone. Though he'd never full admit it, she made him believe.

"...Maybe you should have." he said finally. Most people would probably have answered differently but Duo wasn't most people. His mind went back to Father Maxwell and Sister Helen. They had tried so hard to barter for him to believe in the existence of God but the most they could get was for him to admit to a God of Death. For that was the truth he knew in. Death came for all. The righteous and the wicked. Relena had survived the destruction of her nation. It burned down around her. The assassination of her adopted father, the subsequent death of her adoptive mother. Miraculously, she had survived through it all but it didn't stop. Death kept coming for her. In the form of a radical, the form of a revolt, a shooter, a terrorist and so many other things. Things that he kept trying to stop but it just kept coming. All the time. Endless stream. But death came for all and even Relena knew she was on borrowed time.

He looked into her blue eyes and for a moment she just stared at him before raising the bottle and giving him a brittle smile. "Well there's always tomorrow"


End file.
